A subject that hits home very much and I think is important to cover: Bullying. This can take many shapes and forms and be encountered anywhere. I experienced it in grade school, it has happened to me in the work place, and the place I expected it least till the last 4 years, online, the world wide web. The following post will go through what I deal with today and work back to roughly 1995, the early school days. Lets begin.
Before long I am going to be back to no caffeine, no tomato, nothing even the slightest acidic, just plain pasta and rice. I have been going downhill again, quick, and the addiction to caffeine and large intake is partly to blame. I've come to the conclusion that it helps numb me a bit and lessen some of the intense feelings I get. Gastritis and stomach problems aren't new to me, just something that comes and goes on an almost yearly basis. It's something that can be largely attributed to stress, caffeine, and acidic foods. It's a form of acid reflux. Another cause can be alcohol, but my intake there has been almost none in the past year. I do attribute some of my problems though to my lowest point 3 1/2 years ago when I had a bit too much.
So what does this have to do with bullying you say? I think it has a lot to do if I look back to childhood.
Very early in school was ok, not horrible. Elementary school as they call it in the states. There was just the typical teasing of one another and chasing people around the playground. Back then I even had it in me to talk to other people and socialize. That changed very quickly though about 1997, middle school.
Middle school is the age where people start changing rooms between classes, get lockers, and all that. This was the first opportunity that people could really start being mean to one another with barely any consequence. If you reported bullying you got labeled as a snitch by your peers and harassed even more. The superiors, such as teachers, and principals didn't even care to intervene. As I try to understand what's wrong with me and the underlying cause behind my issues with mental illness, I think the problems start here.
There were a number of encounters I had with different people who will remain nameless throughout this post. You may think I would have forgotten their names, but names and encounters all still feel very real as they just happened yesterday. You could say it contributes to my resistance to meet new people. Bullying has an everlasting affect on your target, it's not as harmless as you may think when you're involved with it. Especially at a young age the consequences seem like all fun and games. Educate yourself a bit, follow my experiences, and see what you can do to help combat the ever growing world of bullying and mean spirit.
One guy had nothing better to do than throw insults at me. The insults started with my clothes, because I wasn't wearing the most expensive brand out there. Because of my clothes and desire to do well in school it progressed to objects being thrown at me, scissors in one case. Then came the threats to "jump me", the term people used then and still do today to beat someone up. It even went to the point where I considered it to be death threats. Threats to meet somewhere complete with weapons. Crazy to think about at a young age.
On another occasion someone had nothing better to do than name calling. One day this guy had the nerve to attempt to choke me. My friend stood up to me and he nearly got knocked in the head.
Another day someone had the brilliant idea to start stealing from me, wasn't like I was popular and mattered. Not even the principal stood up for me, said there was nothing he could do and wouldn't get involved. Despite there being full knowledge of who was involved and indirect admission of guilt. Theft is a separate issue of bullying, however; I consider the underlying issue behind why it happened to do with bullying.
One last real life example I've dealt with is the response to my shyness back in school. I was very shy, and as such had very few friends, but I did have them. If I made the effort to try and meet someone new, a girl for example, I'd be made fun of and denounced by guys as unworthy or laughed at. This was the whole good guy vs bad guy mentality that is stuck within young children and teens these days. I was the good guy.
Those were all real life examples, but the same happens online (in gaming for example) today. Since the bullying happens online, people aren't as responsible for their actions because no one really knows who they are. Therefore they feel they can do whatever they want. Real people are behind the screens though and despite it being online and dealing with avatars, the real life consequences are still very real.
So what does bullying have to do with mental health? It forms and provides the roots for some core issues.
The people who did those things to me back in school probably thought what they were doing was harmless at the time. One long term effect has been a lack of self esteem. I developed a fear of people as well because I am afraid of how they will react to me and if they will accept me. Listening to the music I like and standing up for my interests in public is even very difficult, because I worry if the guy next to me is going to like the same things. I worry about being made fun of for being myself, like what happened many years ago. These are the core issues I think stem from bullying and have evolved into the more serious conditions I deal with today: anxiety, depression, etc. After 16 years I'm unsure if I'll ever be able to completely get over my past.
These may not be the most extreme of cases that you hear about in the news or which you have experienced since they are not. I won't claim them to be. The purpose of sharing these experiences is to highlight the issue of bullying and ultimately what results of it in the long term. The results get worse as the bullying is gets worse.
Next time you think about telling someone to hurt themselves. You make fun of their weight. Look down on them because they aren't in the popular crowd. Tease them about what they wear and who they hang out with. Ridicule them because of their race, gender, or sexuality. Remember, they are a person, equal as you.
What you say to this person can and will have everlasting affects physically, mentally, and emotionally.
You can make a difference today by putting a stop to any bullying you may be involved with.
Stand up for that person next to you who is being bullied.
This may not get rid of the mental health problems someone has, but you will help them because they can focus more on themselves and not have those false issues in their head that you placed there. In some cases getting rid of this catalyst could even save someone from experiencing a major problem with mental illness.
Most importantly, helping to eradicate bullying will save lives.
No comments:
Post a Comment